121 Jobs That Don't Suck
Believe it or not, I was once responsible for picking out the underwear for Britney Spears. Wow, I can not tell you how much I hated that job! Only three months into the job, she ended up firing me. She believed she did not have the need for underwear. I remember her saying in my exit interview “Ya’all I don’t need underwear”. I strongly believe she, and the world, regrets firing me. After that horrible work experience I vowed to never have a job that sucked again. So, I spent 121 days locked in my closet thinking about what would be the world's greatest job. Each day I came to a new conclusion. Lucky for you, during my 121 day focus session I took very detailed notes by candle light. So here it is folks, 121 jobs that do not suck...
Obvious Jobs That Don’t Suck (Day 1 through 35)
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Brewer – What else do I have to say then “You get to sample your own product”? Game Tester – You get paid to play video games. Ahhh the good life.
Life Guard – Sun, bikinis, and six Packs. Be the next Mitch Buchanan.
Actor– Enjoy the rich and famous lifestyle.
Failed Actor – If you find yourself on the B-List do not worry. You can always do reality TV. Here is to you Ponch.
Mascot – You get to watch all your favorite games right on the playing field!
Ice Cream Maker – Sugar + Milk + Ice = Fun!
Cartoonist – Get paid to draw.
Surfer- The only downer is getting eaten by shark.
Food Critic – All you have to do is love food.
Hooters Cook – Work with good-looking women and you get to cook food.
Game Master – Also know as a GM. You get to rule to the world in your favorite video game. Here is an example of how uber you could be.
Airplane Pilot – Fly the skies!
Ski/snowboard instructor – Get paid to play in the snow!
Fishing Guide – Love to fish?
Astronaut – Fly me to the moon!
Glass Blower – Shaping molten glass into beautiful water pipes is truly an underrated art form.
Sky Diver Instructor – Just make sure to pack your parachute correctly or this could be a quick career.
Archaeologist – Pass me the whip.
Teacher – You might not receive the biggest paycheck, but you get the chance to shape the minds of the future.
Photographer – Point and shoot.
Carney – Teeth are not required.
Sportscaster – If Joe Namath can do it, you can. Just make sure not to drink too much on your off days!
Cameraman – Nobody sees you, but you get to see all the action up close.
Model – If you like to smoke and can make yourself throw up on demand this job is for you.
Failed Model - If you fail at modeling then you can marry a Brady!
Professional Athlete – Get paid to play sports. Take your pick: NHL, NBA, NFL, and more!
Hair Stylist – If you do not want to go to college and still want a degree this one might be for you! Make Mom and Dad proud!
Coffee Barista – Love caffeine? One of the perks of this job is that you get it for free.
Movie Critic – Are you addicted to movies? Then embrace that addiction and voice your opinion. Trust me someone will listen.
Racer Car Driver – All you have to do is make left turns! How hard could it possibly be? Watch out for the invisible fire!
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Baker - You may have to wake up early in the morning, but you do it for the “carbs”. Roller Coaster Architect – Make sure you double-check your calculations.
Pro Golfer – People carry your bags while you hit a small white ball with a club. How much better could it get?
Rocket Scientist – You could finally be like Wile E. Coyote.
Stock Broker – Be as cool as Kevin Bacon in Quicksilver or Charlie Sheen in Wall Street. You got to love the 80’s.
Lawyer – People may not like you, but the paycheck is nice.
Professional Bowler – You get to wear cool shoes and play with balls.
Makeup Artist – You could make people pretty or ugly.
Missus – Oil me up baby!
Private Investigator – Catch spouses cheating.
Roadie – Rock on man!
Painter – Nothing like a freshly painted room.
Florist – Providing the men of the world a chance to make up for what they did wrong.
Pharmaceutical Representative – A professional drug dealer. The pay is great and you get to sample your product.
Interior Decorator – You could be come a glorified furniture mover.
Fashion Designer – Even with bad taste you could make it in this industry.
Pool Cleaner – It is like being a water boy.
Computer Programmer – All you nerds have a chance to become rich and get all the hot women finally.
Nanny – A life of servitude, but molding the life of a child is priceless.
Navy Seal – Guns + Guns + Guns = Fun!
Botanist – The perfect job for the ex-hippies out there.
Underwater Welder – The perfect mix of fire and water.
FBI Agent – No, not a female body inspector.
CIA Agent – Work for ….. the man.
Meteorologist - All you have to do it predict and use percentages.
News Caster – I’m Ron Burgundy?
Yoga Instructor - If you can bend like a pretzel you got this job.
Crop Duster – Flying low level plane in the country. How perfect.
Butler – A life of servitude, but you get a great paycheck.
Celebrity Agent – I heard that Britney Spears was hiring.
Personal Assistant – A life of servitude, but you get to work for the coolest people on earth!
Secretary – If you can land a job in fortune 500 company you cpuld make big dollars answering phones and doing whatever your boss asks *wink* *wink*.
Body Builder – After you put the weights down you could become a governor.
Sommelier – If you love wine this is for you. People will actually pay you because you are a wino.
Cobbler – Everyone needs shoes.
Poet – Anything you write can be poetry.
Farmer – Nothing like taking the tractor out for a sunrise spin.
High-end Waiter – You can spit in your customers’ food without them knowing and with a bill totaling around $200 for two people you should get around $40.
Coach – You could tell other people to do things that you could never do.
Inventor – You might come up with many ideas that fail, but all you need is one.
Referee - You get to watch and influence all your favorite games.
Counselor - If you don’t want to work all year long and think you are good with people then counseling would be a great choice. The highest paid counselors work at elementary schools. Think about the hardest situation you might have to deal with: "Johnny stole my ice cream cone" "Now Johnny was that nice?"
Real Estate Agent – If you are good with people and like money, this is for you. Your salary is all commission, but you get anywhere around 2-3% of your sales. With the medium house price around $250,000 you take home $7,500 a pop. Imagine if you worked an area with $1,000,000 homes.
Chef – You get to wear a funny hat and eat great food.
Animal Trainer – If you think you can hear what animals are saying then strive for this job.
Dog Breeder – Ahh the miracle of life.
Plastic Surgeon – There are many fields you could go into and you make way to much money. You can even be on TV!
Radio DJ – If you are lacking in the looks department, but have a great personality then radio is for you.
Volcanologist – You can be like Pierce Brosnan in Dante's Peak.
Fire Fighter – You actually get paid to sleep on the job. When you are not sleeping you get to save lives and play with fire.
Police Officer – The perfect job if you like guns and fast cars. I mean anyone can become a police officer these days.
Paramedic – What is sexier than a paramedic?
Music Producer – Coach, Record, Mix and, Master.
Cal Trans Worker – You get to work for Arnold Schwarzenegger the Governator.
Park Ranger – You get to wear a cool hat and work outdoors.
Marine Biologist – Be the next Jacques-Yves Cousteau.
Casino Dealer – Learn all the secrets.
Captain of a Charter Deep Sea Boat – Be the old man in the sea.
Nurse – If someone dies, it is not your fault. Point your finger at the doctor.
Doctor – It may be your fault when someone dies, but you get paid a lot of money to deal with it.
Flight Attendant – Fly around the world. “Peanuts anyone? Peanuts”
Personal Trainer – “Where going to pump you up!”
Department of Natural Resources – Be a protector of mother nature.
Entertainer - Be the next Cedric or work on a cruise ship.
Racing Crew Team – If you can change a tire this job is for you!
Webmaster – High paying and you could work from home.
Travel Writer – Stay at word class resorts for free. Ahh the power of the written language.
Winemaker – You get to taste your product.
Graphic Designer – Replace your paint brushes with a mouse.
ChaCha Search Guide – Find answers for people. Not the highest paying job out there, but you can do it in your underwear.
Travel Agent - Be a vacation expert.
Vice President of the United States – You get all the prestige of being the President without actually having everyone hate you.
Reality TV Producer – You can never really make a bad show. I mean people think “I Love New York” is a great reality show.
K-Fed’s Bodyguards – You know this white boy won’t ever get in a fight. You might have to shield the loser from people throwing his own CDs at him.
Crab Deck Hand – Deadly, but fun!
Counter-Terrorism – Risky, but you can be a part of ridding terror from the world. Like President Bush.
Blogger - Make money online.
Garbage Man – You may smell when you get home, but you get to drive a cool truck!
My Job – I get to sit in my bathrobe, drink my coffee, and think.
Priest - You do not have to worry about the ladies, but watch out for the little boys.
Nun – You do not have to worry about finding a man. Jesus is your man.
Civil War Actor - You will always know what side is going to win.
Cattle Rancher - Moooooo... Moooooo... You still could live your childhood fantasy of being a cowboy.
Bouncer – You have to love getting paid to beat up people.
Sword Smith – The perfect job for the Dungeon and Dragons nerd.
Tattoo Artist - Your artwork is permanent.
Paper Sales – You get to work with Dwight, Jim (Big Tuna), and Pam.
Santa Clause – No not the real Santa Clause, but the one in your local mall.
Drug Dealer – The pay is great and you get to sample your product.
Pornstar – What? You know you were all thinking it.
Not So Obvious Jobs That Don’t Suck (Day 36 through 102)
What The Hell Was I Thinking? (Day 103 through 121)
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